December 03, 2008

I don't know how people do it

I mean, how do people go through life not eating exactly what they want to eat? I'm watching The Biggest Loser right now on television, like the first time I've ever watched it, and what people are doing on this show is remarkable. I've struggled with the same 20-40 pounds my whole life and, let's be honest, I've never really done anything about it. Today alone, it was like mental torture to eat fruit for breakfast, a healthy salad with tuna for lunch (no dressing, just balsamic vinegar!), and veggies and a piece of fish for dinner. Seriously, turning down Carla's offers of Krispy Kreme donuts and a tasting at the new David Burke restaurant were really really really really tough. For me, food has always been the one thing that reliably makes me happy -- I don't know how much of this is genetic, my mom says that I've always been like this, even when I was a toddler -- and to give it up is almost painful. I know everyone who diets goes through this -- to be honest, I've never honestly dieted one day in my life -- so obviously these aren't newfangled sentiments.

I wonder how long I can carry on doing this.