Flipping between Puppy Bowl and the Super Bowl

Also doing laundry and tidying up around the apartment. I'm such a multi-tasker. No, seriously, I don't know how I manage to make such a mess out of ONE ROOM. About once every four to six weeks I start out with every good intention to live a minimalist, neat, streamlined home life. Two weeks later my coffee tables are covered in dumped-out-purse-contents, there are dozens of pairs of shoes all over my floor, and I can't even sit on my sofa because it's covered in piles of black clothes.

There is an African Grey called Pepper the Parrot singing the national anthem at the Puppy Bowl. Seriously. Can this be more surreal?

Excuse me while I go and throw out everything I own. All my minimalistic intentions get thwarted by my uncontrollable maximalism. I can't believe that when I renovated this place, I had a vision of living in a white box. Like Edina's friends, the modernist freaks on AbFab:

"Observe Everything. Always think for yourself. Never let other people make important decisions for you." — from Bad News by Edward St. Aubyn