I thought I lost my copy of the Karl Lagerfeld Diet, but I just found it again tonight

Lagerfeld is one of the smartest, wittiest, nearly-always-right famous people around. I've never spoken to him personally, but I've been in the same room and have heard him give talks. Every rapid-fire sentence that comes from his mouth is really spot-on. He doesn't ever seem to waste words. I love his diet book -- I got it in Europe right when it came out. Lagerfeld gets it -- his book isn't full of this b.s. self-esteem psychotherapy talk. Instead, he writes stuff like: "A respectable appearance is sufficient to make people more interested in your soul. It is the sum of our experiences which makes us interesting and having been through a period of relative unattractiveness (real or imagined) can be useful." He's very pragmatic.
"I think you have to be able to laugh at yourself. To follow a diet like that you have to have a sense of humour. Don't take things too seriously; make fun of yourself; admit why you are doing it. It's a physical thing, that's all. There's no point in pretending it's anything else and complicating matters. You have to give yourself orders as if you were a young army recruit. You have to be your own officer and soldier. The general tells the soldier what he wants of him; how he must behave, what he must do. If you remain faithful to your physical self and your mental self, I think it can work. That's the secret. That's how I approached my diet. You are a general and you have a single soldier in your army. You must give him instructions and he must carry them out. It may annoy him but he has no choice."
"Observe Everything. Always think for yourself. Never let other people make important decisions for you." — from Bad News by Edward St. Aubyn